From: noscieno@aol.com (NoScieno) Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology Subject: Re: The Scien-ku-tron Super Mk VII(tm) - I love it Date: 25 Dec 1997 16:44:39 GMT Lines: 101 Message-ID: <19971225164400.LAA10535@ladder02.news.aol.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: ladder02.news.aol.com X-Admin: news@aol.com References: <349ccc92.4082080@troll.apana.org.au> Organization: AOL http://www.aol.com X-Newsreader: AOL Offline Reader In article <349ccc92.4082080@troll.apana.org.au>, neil@gargoyle.apana.or::g.au (Neil Muspratt) writes: >After recently obtaining my unofficial ARSCC cryptographic software >and tuning to the top secret Entheta Band Channel at the extreme end >of the spectrum, I succeeded in downloading the plans for the new >improved Scien-ku-tron Super Mk VII(tm). Ah, that ol' thing. I haven't run mine in months -- needs more shielding among other things. You have great courage, surely. You've been warned about the Entheta-Beam output? A tip: don't plug that module in unless you absolutely have to. Here in the states the Federal Communications Commission takes a dim view of such hijinks, to say nothing of the effect on household pets. It does make short work of pesky PIs though. >It's a great idea this new DIY system - I was really chafing at the >thought of actually having to *buy* two of these things. Ouch! My >credit card is hot enough already, what with R6 Day nearly here and >all. In a pinch you can run two sessions on your Mk VII simultaneously -- in two separate units of time. They don't tell you this right off because, well, when you're dealing with 250kv Tesla coils your dimensional stabilizer had better be spot-on. Download bulletin SW-RD-1277b for more info. >I hope the ARSCC Finance Police won't sue over the loss of funds, >but hey, we all have to do what we can on the budget we're allocated, >okay? Don't worry about the ARSCC-FP(wdne). They're in Affluence right now and aren't too picky about a few hundred bucks here and there. >Anyway, with a bit of tinkering here and there, a new AI interface >courtesy of some of the boffins at work, several month's worth of >archived a.r.s contributions, the collected input of three critical >books on the cult (plus a few choice works of nonsense by L. Rong >thrown in for good measure) and ten minutes left by itself to read >through Encyclopaedia Britannica CD 97, it came up with the output >below on its first run. Total time, only 0.0281 seconds! Yeah, it's fast and tireless. You'll have rooms full of the stuff before you know it. >I'll probably be throttling it back to single-haiku mode after this >little episode. Hell, leave it alone for a few minutes and I reckon it >will eat up all your free hard disk space. Don't try this at home on a >286 boys and girls! It's a good thing too that I ignored the owner's >manual and didn't install the 100% standard quad Pentium II CPU array, >settling instead for a mere Pentium 166 with MMX. Hmm, interesting -- the Skunk-Works *have* been busy, haven't they? When I was on the Beta team, we were stuck with surplus TRS-80s cobbled-up to R-C circuits and diode bridges. >Even so, I'm not >looking forward to the next electricity bill. Oh, one pointer for all >you like-minded ARSCC handypeople out there - adequate ventilation in >the room is an absolute *must* once this sucker's up and running. It's not the heat, it's the humidity. >Now, I've just got to work out how to stop the darned thing from >making dozens of unauthorised calls to all the ISPs in town when my >back's turned. Have I created a monster? Silly question -- of course you have. Bite the bullet and let it have its own account. Give it a few role-playing games to keep it occupied and it shouldn't cause any more trouble. I'd recommend "El-Ron the Magnificent," which you can get on the Entheta Channel. >Its appetite for web pages >seems insatiable, particularly those with URLs containing "dianetics", >"scientology", "lronhubbard", "cchr", etc. And another weird thing - >every time I catch it in the act, I keep hearing these strange noises >coming from inside the box, almost like synthesised laughter... It knows what it likes. Not for no reason is "Tron" in the name. Ever seen that movie? >Nah, it must be my hourly Prozac ration screwing with my hearing. No, your hunch is incorrect. Prozac is completely harmless and can only have beneficial effects, regardless. Just having it in the room is good for you. The Scien-ku-tron's unrelenting sense of humor will eat everything in sight. You may have noticed the extreme input/output ratio and the lack of a data dump. Well those extra conjunctions, prepositions and stuff ain't going anywhere, it's being bottled up in the registers. While it sometimes finds some useful bit to use on a current operation, the vast majority is just packing in tighter and tighter. This is why it laughs -- it's being tickled, so to speak. You might try sicking it on the Bible or Quran for a minute or two to purge the cache. Just set the output to "null" if you have nothing against *real* religions. Keep running it and you'll be up to your ears in Prozac. - NoScieno accepts NO mail (spam-bounce). Try "thynkr[AT]aol" "Frankly, if you folks want to stick light bulbs in your mouths and form devotional circles around life-sized statues of Uncle Fester it is fine with me." - LilAlex to RonsAmigo, on a.r.s.